How times change . For instance, look at birthday parties and gauge for yourself .
Was thinking back to my birthdays.
The parties were held at home & planned by parents & relatives .
They were small simple affairs . 15 friends was usually what I had . They were always accompanied by both parents. ( Did the fathers not go to work ? Were they not exhausted by the time they returned ? )
Well the party started at 4 pm and was always held on a Saturday irrespective of when the actual big day was .
Friends all came well dressed . They were punctual . They carried gifts wrapped in fancy paper - kite paper at times !
Not to forget the one box camera to record memories and all those artificial poses and the SAY CHEESE !
Listen to some of the gifts I received .
A compendium of games was very common . For the uninitiated it was a box with 3 boards in it - Chinese checkers, Ludo& Snakes and Ladders, Chess & Draughts . The coins/ men/ tokens& dice were in a little plastic bag .
Then there was Shirt pieces, socks, vests ( Yes ) Cricket bats, Tennis balls, Rubber balls, Marbles, 2 Badminton rackets, TT Bats with one ball , a football , a hockey stick .
At times there was an envelope with money - no not a 1000 rupees - probably 10 or 20 .
The best gift I ever got was a carom board and I had it for years and finally became quite a champion in Allahabad .
My grandfather once took me out and bought me an air gun - when I came home all excited my mother saw it and nearly had a fit . The gun was taken away and I was promised to get it back when I was older ( I was 8 ) . I never saw it again.
I hated the cloth gifts . Who wants to get 3 white vests for a birthday? I once remember opening the gifts as the party got over. Yes the first gift I opened was 3 white vests . I threw them on the bed in a temper and referred to the giver as a fool . I then picked them up in a temper- threw them on the ground and stamped them - then I was smacked and smacked and made to say sorry !
I probably wore one of them the next day to school .
Then there were the games . Musical chairs and musical arms , Hiding things for us to find, I spy , 7 tiles and kings.
Have you heard of a KHOI bag?
Most of you have probably not so I will need to explain.
A bag stuffed with puffed rice and confetti - then there were whistles , bugles, 25 and 50 pice coins, small toys etc . It was tied to the fan or to a nail in the ceiling.
Everyone gathered under the bag and there was great excitement and a lot of screaming . Then a tall gent was asked to pull a chord . The contents then spilled down and there was a mad scramble with everyone grabbing and pushing to gather up as much of the goodies as possible.
I remember being told year after year- "don't you grab anything - leave the gifts for your friends "
So like a fool I scrambled about on my fours with the others - like a blind boy- purposely avoiding picking up the gifts . I was often in tears as I saw friends scoop up the toys and the coins . At times I felt like banging my head on the wall- this was so not fair . It was my party .
Then there was the cutting of the cake - more often than not baked and iced at home.
There were also patties , chips and sandwiches. Squash seemed to be the drink of the masses so there was plenty of squash - cold and tasty - no ice for me though - I had tonsillitis and adenoids - a dangerous and disgusting combination if ever there was one .
The party got over at 8 . Period . Good night .
Don't get me wrong - at the end of the day I enjoyed the evening . Except for the clothes , the other gifts were fun . The 20 or 30 rupees were kept away to buy marbles and sweets . The bat, the board games , the rackets were all used till as long as they lasted which was usually a few months .
No gifts were recycled . Period.
Then the years went by and soon I was a father ( no I did not marry at 14 )
Then came the birthdays of my two pretty girls . They were different it many ways .
They joined in the planning and had a big say .
Printed invites were distributed - approximately 30 .
Most of the eats were bought . Rasna , squash and cold drinks were offered .
The cake was ordered - usually some fancy shape and fancy candles .
The party started at 6 pm. There were photographs galore .
There was dinner and drinks as well for the adults.
The gifts were Barbie dolls , sets of other dolls , dolls houses , some pretty dresses, larger cash gifts ( which they hated ) , books , etc etc .
There was no khoi bag !
The games were played on the terrace and the gifts to be given were chosen by the girls themselves .
They also chose the games to play and were quite happy organizing and not playing .
There was music and a microphone and the room / terrace was decorated .
Plenty of dancing and some kids sang as well .
Adults sat indoors and had a party of their own . At times they joined the kids on the terrace to see all was well or to help organize a game . They also were asked to step in as photographer and DJ.
Cassettes were in vogue and these were selected in advance .
Oh yes there were return gifts as well and these cost quite a packet.
Some of the adults stayed on for dinner- the close friends- the others left by about 9. 30 . Tired kids often dozed off and were carried home or forced to get up .
After the party the gifts were opened with plenty of oohs and aahs !
An exhausting day came to an end -
The photographs would be given for printing the next day .
Parties today - wow . They are parties indeed.
A month or so before D day , the planning begins .
Where will the party be held - a hotel or a venue needs to be booked . So also a DJ.
The party cant start before 8 and no- Parents and other strange adults are not welcome .
A stretch limo to transport the birthday kid and a few homies to the venue would make a style statement . Not a bad idea .
Clothes- yes clothes need to be bought by the birthday boy / girl.
Very often they go on their own with friends as parents would buy something hideous -( read old fangled).
There are waiters with starters in trays .
Fast food is washed down with Pepsi / coke . Anything else is a no no .
Birthday cake - NO NO NO - I AM NOT A KID .
No one wants dinner either . That's for the nerds .
Then there is the lighting . It's dim, it flashes , there are strobes , scanners, mirrors, twisters and beams - all in varying colours
A camera is now passé- what are mobile phones for? . The photographs are up all over in real time and being viewed all over the world . Some kids carry two phones . They must.
Who knows who may call them and for what . It could be important - they must not miss a call - so two phones are a must . Are they really ?
At times they are messaging while talking to friends - they don't even look down .
Its a smooth draw that would put Clint Eastwood to shame- Pull the phone out - Message - take a call , make a call, click a snap , upload a snap - they make it look so easy indeed.
Phones must be close at hand at all times - while eating , while drinking , while dancing , while in the loo . They are also looked at every 15 seconds .
Comments pour in as soon as a snap is uploaded - some would make a sailor blush - these are 13 year olds mind you ( no this is not my daughter I am referring to ) .
What about the selfies and the selfie sticks - O M G .................
Then there are the chat conversations while the party is in full swing - ASAP, ASL, BTY, TNX, ROFL,TTYL,LMAO,WTH,ZZZZZZZZ . ( I goggled these lest you think I use them )
There is no time for full sentences or full words - there are so many better and more important things to attend to . Like making a call or putting up a cute status.
The clothes take the cake . Why do trousers have to be falling off - what's with the Calvin Kline showing through . Are shades necessary at 6 pm ? Brightly coloured shoes ? Strange hair styles - streaked more often than not .
Did the material fall short for the dress ? Is that a blouse or a top without a bottom or is that actually a dress . Now that's daring . Heels - more like stilts .
Fendi, Armani, Ralph Lauren ,Dune,Fat Moose, Fred Perry, Jack and Jones, Kurt Geiger - they wear them all and more . Money talks . After all clothes maketh a man ( and a woman )
The music - if you can call it music - Ok let it be - you know what I mean . It 's loud, its tuneless , it contains vulgar lyrics , it has strange beats , you cant dance to it - you can sway , you can jerk your head , you can act mad , you can do summersaults- you can spin on your head and on your backside but NO you CAN'T Dance To It.
Maybe dance is an old fashioned word as well and something I don't understand . Maybe this is what they call dancing these days- I don't know .
If your wondering about the games - there are no games- games are for kids they say - they are 13 mind you ! Who plays games these days . So what do they do - they talk - they laugh - oh yes there is the phone ................
Gifts are fine and when given are usually electronics or games played on the play station . Don't dare try and give a doll, socks, or a cricket bat . Arriving with something like that would be as welcome as an Alien invasion . Money is fine though - it's actually welcomed - the larger the amount the better .
I could go on but I can't.
There is a stretch limo which I can see from my window . About 10 unruly kids are scrambling in - I guess its a birthday party .
The parents are saying bye and telling them to have a good time
You can be sure they will .
Was thinking back to my birthdays.
The parties were held at home & planned by parents & relatives .
They were small simple affairs . 15 friends was usually what I had . They were always accompanied by both parents. ( Did the fathers not go to work ? Were they not exhausted by the time they returned ? )
Well the party started at 4 pm and was always held on a Saturday irrespective of when the actual big day was .
Friends all came well dressed . They were punctual . They carried gifts wrapped in fancy paper - kite paper at times !
Not to forget the one box camera to record memories and all those artificial poses and the SAY CHEESE !
Listen to some of the gifts I received .
A compendium of games was very common . For the uninitiated it was a box with 3 boards in it - Chinese checkers, Ludo& Snakes and Ladders, Chess & Draughts . The coins/ men/ tokens& dice were in a little plastic bag .
Then there was Shirt pieces, socks, vests ( Yes ) Cricket bats, Tennis balls, Rubber balls, Marbles, 2 Badminton rackets, TT Bats with one ball , a football , a hockey stick .
At times there was an envelope with money - no not a 1000 rupees - probably 10 or 20 .
The best gift I ever got was a carom board and I had it for years and finally became quite a champion in Allahabad .
My grandfather once took me out and bought me an air gun - when I came home all excited my mother saw it and nearly had a fit . The gun was taken away and I was promised to get it back when I was older ( I was 8 ) . I never saw it again.
I hated the cloth gifts . Who wants to get 3 white vests for a birthday? I once remember opening the gifts as the party got over. Yes the first gift I opened was 3 white vests . I threw them on the bed in a temper and referred to the giver as a fool . I then picked them up in a temper- threw them on the ground and stamped them - then I was smacked and smacked and made to say sorry !
I probably wore one of them the next day to school .
Then there were the games . Musical chairs and musical arms , Hiding things for us to find, I spy , 7 tiles and kings.
Have you heard of a KHOI bag?
Most of you have probably not so I will need to explain.
A bag stuffed with puffed rice and confetti - then there were whistles , bugles, 25 and 50 pice coins, small toys etc . It was tied to the fan or to a nail in the ceiling.
Everyone gathered under the bag and there was great excitement and a lot of screaming . Then a tall gent was asked to pull a chord . The contents then spilled down and there was a mad scramble with everyone grabbing and pushing to gather up as much of the goodies as possible.
I remember being told year after year- "don't you grab anything - leave the gifts for your friends "
So like a fool I scrambled about on my fours with the others - like a blind boy- purposely avoiding picking up the gifts . I was often in tears as I saw friends scoop up the toys and the coins . At times I felt like banging my head on the wall- this was so not fair . It was my party .
Then there was the cutting of the cake - more often than not baked and iced at home.
There were also patties , chips and sandwiches. Squash seemed to be the drink of the masses so there was plenty of squash - cold and tasty - no ice for me though - I had tonsillitis and adenoids - a dangerous and disgusting combination if ever there was one .
The party got over at 8 . Period . Good night .
Don't get me wrong - at the end of the day I enjoyed the evening . Except for the clothes , the other gifts were fun . The 20 or 30 rupees were kept away to buy marbles and sweets . The bat, the board games , the rackets were all used till as long as they lasted which was usually a few months .
No gifts were recycled . Period.
Then the years went by and soon I was a father ( no I did not marry at 14 )
Then came the birthdays of my two pretty girls . They were different it many ways .
They joined in the planning and had a big say .
Printed invites were distributed - approximately 30 .
Most of the eats were bought . Rasna , squash and cold drinks were offered .
The cake was ordered - usually some fancy shape and fancy candles .
The party started at 6 pm. There were photographs galore .
There was dinner and drinks as well for the adults.
The gifts were Barbie dolls , sets of other dolls , dolls houses , some pretty dresses, larger cash gifts ( which they hated ) , books , etc etc .
There was no khoi bag !
The games were played on the terrace and the gifts to be given were chosen by the girls themselves .
They also chose the games to play and were quite happy organizing and not playing .
There was music and a microphone and the room / terrace was decorated .
Plenty of dancing and some kids sang as well .
Adults sat indoors and had a party of their own . At times they joined the kids on the terrace to see all was well or to help organize a game . They also were asked to step in as photographer and DJ.
Cassettes were in vogue and these were selected in advance .
Oh yes there were return gifts as well and these cost quite a packet.
Some of the adults stayed on for dinner- the close friends- the others left by about 9. 30 . Tired kids often dozed off and were carried home or forced to get up .
After the party the gifts were opened with plenty of oohs and aahs !
An exhausting day came to an end -
The photographs would be given for printing the next day .
Parties today - wow . They are parties indeed.
A month or so before D day , the planning begins .
Where will the party be held - a hotel or a venue needs to be booked . So also a DJ.
The party cant start before 8 and no- Parents and other strange adults are not welcome .
A stretch limo to transport the birthday kid and a few homies to the venue would make a style statement . Not a bad idea .
Clothes- yes clothes need to be bought by the birthday boy / girl.
Very often they go on their own with friends as parents would buy something hideous -( read old fangled).
There are waiters with starters in trays .
Fast food is washed down with Pepsi / coke . Anything else is a no no .
Birthday cake - NO NO NO - I AM NOT A KID .
No one wants dinner either . That's for the nerds .
Then there is the lighting . It's dim, it flashes , there are strobes , scanners, mirrors, twisters and beams - all in varying colours
A camera is now passé- what are mobile phones for? . The photographs are up all over in real time and being viewed all over the world . Some kids carry two phones . They must.
Who knows who may call them and for what . It could be important - they must not miss a call - so two phones are a must . Are they really ?
At times they are messaging while talking to friends - they don't even look down .
Its a smooth draw that would put Clint Eastwood to shame- Pull the phone out - Message - take a call , make a call, click a snap , upload a snap - they make it look so easy indeed.
Phones must be close at hand at all times - while eating , while drinking , while dancing , while in the loo . They are also looked at every 15 seconds .
Comments pour in as soon as a snap is uploaded - some would make a sailor blush - these are 13 year olds mind you ( no this is not my daughter I am referring to ) .
What about the selfies and the selfie sticks - O M G .................
Then there are the chat conversations while the party is in full swing - ASAP, ASL, BTY, TNX, ROFL,TTYL,LMAO,WTH,ZZZZZZZZ . ( I goggled these lest you think I use them )
There is no time for full sentences or full words - there are so many better and more important things to attend to . Like making a call or putting up a cute status.
The clothes take the cake . Why do trousers have to be falling off - what's with the Calvin Kline showing through . Are shades necessary at 6 pm ? Brightly coloured shoes ? Strange hair styles - streaked more often than not .
Did the material fall short for the dress ? Is that a blouse or a top without a bottom or is that actually a dress . Now that's daring . Heels - more like stilts .
Fendi, Armani, Ralph Lauren ,Dune,Fat Moose, Fred Perry, Jack and Jones, Kurt Geiger - they wear them all and more . Money talks . After all clothes maketh a man ( and a woman )
The music - if you can call it music - Ok let it be - you know what I mean . It 's loud, its tuneless , it contains vulgar lyrics , it has strange beats , you cant dance to it - you can sway , you can jerk your head , you can act mad , you can do summersaults- you can spin on your head and on your backside but NO you CAN'T Dance To It.
Maybe dance is an old fashioned word as well and something I don't understand . Maybe this is what they call dancing these days- I don't know .
If your wondering about the games - there are no games- games are for kids they say - they are 13 mind you ! Who plays games these days . So what do they do - they talk - they laugh - oh yes there is the phone ................
Gifts are fine and when given are usually electronics or games played on the play station . Don't dare try and give a doll, socks, or a cricket bat . Arriving with something like that would be as welcome as an Alien invasion . Money is fine though - it's actually welcomed - the larger the amount the better .
I could go on but I can't.
There is a stretch limo which I can see from my window . About 10 unruly kids are scrambling in - I guess its a birthday party .
The parents are saying bye and telling them to have a good time
You can be sure they will .
