Good advice

 I have often been asked for advice on a wide range of topics .

Music, Education, Writing , Speaking , Books, Holidays , Relationships and the like . People assume that ' oldish  men' like me are wise  & experienced enough to advise .

I probably am good at giving advice, as people are very appreciative and some return for more. Not sure about the 'wisdom' part though but I won't sell myself short . 

No, I don't ever think I am extra smart, or anything to that effect so don't get me wrong.

As a young boy, I simply detested  people giving me  unsolicited advice or even worse, asking me questions  - my mother, my aunts and uncles , my grandmother , miscellaneous relatives and friends who dropped in unannounced  were all in that group - and all of a sudden, without so much as a by your leave, the topic was always    ' ME' 

The questions & advice generally centered around me  and my studies.

You must study harder ( seriously ?) 

How many hours a day do you study? . ( I counted it in minutes) 

Have you got your report card?

What happened in school today ? ( 'Nothing'-  was usually the answer) 

If you don't study  you will fail ( I once did)

What do you want to become when you get big- this was an all time favourite and I had no clue !

You should read some good books ( I did)

Don't keep the book too close to your face, or you will end up wearing spectacles or even blind .

Have you had a bath ? 

Eat all your food/ take more  - remember there are children who are starving all over the world . I was confused as to how eating more food would help the starving children. However I never asked that question and it still perplexes me 

 

Then there was the more personal stuff when I was older ,which annoyed me even more .

Have you got a job?

Are you helping your mother ? 

How much do you earn ? ( I started out on Rs 450) 

Are you saving money ? ( There was none to save ) 

Are you wasting your money ?  ( No - not again ) 

When do you plan to buy a place of your own? ( Joke) 

And then as I was ' of the age' or some such phrase,  the questions and advice continued.

Do you have a girlfriend?

You should be looking for a nice girl. 

Who is your girlfriend ?

Do you like so and so ?

Why are you being sly ? 

Look he's blushing . 

Are you 'going steady' with anyone? 

When are you planning to settle down ? 

The questions and advice was never ending . 

So to all those who gave me advice, I say--  "thank you" - jokes aside- a lot of it came in handy, and let me explain in as succinct a way as possible.  

I did study fairly hard towards the end of my time in school , and yes I got a job ! I still have a job ! 

Am very regular with my baths!

I loved my mother! 

I have a house!

I am saving money !  

I probably didn't listen to you about holding books close to my face as I wear spectacles.

I  had a few girlfriends ( OMG some will read this ) 

I married one !   ( She is not on FB ! )  

Now I am not going to give any unsolicited advice, but something  happened this morning which I must share - I know you may say 'here he goes' but stay with me here. 

I was in a hurry.

  I had got up at 4. 45 am as usual , but I was fiddling with my phone, I made my tea and had it ,read the news papers ,checked and attended to mail, did  some  writing, talked  to and annoyed the cat and I guess I never kept my eye on the clock . I also went into the garden, and like Mr Bean, I swung my arms a few times , stretched once or twice, breathed in and out a few times too and was happy with my exercise for the day. 

Before I could say Jack Robinson, it was 7.00 am 

Thirty minutes later  I was ready, and all that was left was to spray on the after shave and go down for breakfast.

I chose the bottle of aftershave closest to me , looked into the mirror - was pleased at what I saw, and sprayed for all I was worth.

Haste makes waste. 

I was getting late, was eager for a good breakfast , was thinking about filling fuel in my  car and contemplating a few meetings during the day. Busy , busy , busy !

All this had contributed to me not checking which way the nozzle was pointed . In a fraction of a second I was screaming in pain, as the cologne saturated my eyes.

It then took me all of ten minutes to rinse my eyes, walk towards my towel like a zombie, and sit on the bed, while my eyes watered, for all they are worth. Trust me, they stung like hell.  I still feel the discomfort five hours later . 

As I told you - am not giving advice but at times people like me lack common sense ! I should have been more careful . 

However - I'm only human . 

By the way- has anyone ever had this happen to them ?