Grooming gone wild

 Grooming Gone Wild

For most of my life, my grooming routine has been refreshingly simple—get a haircut at an ordinary barber shop, a shave if I am feeling lazy, and maybe, if I’m feeling particularly indulgent, a head massage. That’s it- No fuss, no frills, just the bare essentials. But lately, I find myself being slowly dragged—kicking and screaming—into the ever-expanding world of men’s grooming. Now this is an industry worth investing in!

I see men around me with elaborate skincare routines to boot—cleansers, toners, moisturizers, serums, eye creams, exfoliators, and who knows what else. Some have dedicated morning and night routines, applying layer after careful layer like they’re restoring an ancient masterpiece. There are men getting manicures, pedicures, facials, and even eyebrow threading (when did that become a thing for men?). Some even discuss the benefits of Retinol and vitamin C serums – I am not even exactly sure what these do to the face. 

Mind you, they do look good, but I think I do too!

I, on the other hand, operate on a much simpler philosophy- if it’s a cream, it must be doing something worthwhile. I pick up whatever I find lying around on the dressing table —day cream, night cream, anti-aging cream (though I have no idea what it's supposed to prevent)—and slap it onto my face in a hurry. They all belong to my wife, but who cares. No circular motions, no expert application, and certainly no waiting for it to “absorb” into the skin for me. One time, I unknowingly used foot cream, and honestly, my face felt the same as it always does. There’s no science to my method, just a vague hope that a bit of moisture might be enough to keep my face from turning into an old leather wallet sometime soon.

While others dab, pat, and gently massage their faces with precision, I’m in and out of the bathroom in under a few minutes, wondering if I should be doing more or if I’m just the last man left who still believes a splash of cold water and ‘any cream’ in the morning, is a legitimate skincare routine.

While I barely give my face a second thought, the world of male grooming has exploded. There are charcoal masks, gold-infused serums, anti-aging potions, and a whole range of beard balms and hair-thickening solutions. Then there are the instruments—steamers to open pores, scrapers to clean skin, and rollers to stimulate collagen (whatever that means). Celebrities like David Beckham, Cristiano Ronaldo, and even The Rock have turned grooming into an art form. The result? Men now spend as much time (and money) on looking good as women.

Companies like L’Oréal Men, Nivea, and Gillette are making a fortune off this trend, selling everything from anti-fatigue moisturizers to an assortment of creams. And while I watch all of this unfold, I can’t help but wonder—am I the odd one out? Is this just the way of the future, or are men genuinely becoming more vain?

For now I remain an outsider with a simple routine if you can even call it that.