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Saturday, 8 June 2019

Cards , greetings and the like

Was clearing out some old papers the other day and came across a bunch of cards- birthdays , Anniversary, Christmas, Easter , Get well Soon , Congratulations ……. They were from my mother who passed on 3 years ago . I went through the cards and began reminiscing – sure brought a tear to my eye and set me thinking . She loved sending cards and she made sure to write a few lines as well with news about herself and questions about us . Reading through those cards brought back wonderful memories . They gave me a warm fuzzy feeling – yes I felt good . In this fast paced world that we live in today , life is always in “Fast Forward” and we have no time nor inclination to stand and stare . It’s a waste of time to stop to smell the roses , to try the road not taken , to lie in bed and relax . I remember as a young boy using post cards , inlands, aerograms & stamped envelopes to write to relatives and friends . The joys of putting pen to paper is a long lost art and something that the present and future generation will consider a waste of time . Very few people including me , send card by the mail any more – not sure when was the last time I licked a stamp and stuck it on an envelope . Yes we licked the stamps ! Maybe yukky but it was done by almost everyone !. The whole process of writing with your hands, folding, inserting, addressing the envelope, sticking postage stamps and finally posting the letter in a post office is very time consuming for the present generation and people are running out of time or so they feel. However, with each day serving as a linguistic frenzy and a meaningless race against time , we find that words and sentences often aren’t used in the way we so desire. Small talk with awkward coworkers, someone bragging about their cute , new born , 7 pound baby on Facebook or telling the world where they went for dinner and what they ate , group projects with dead weight members – it is all very transient and often, discouraging and totally uninspiring . I, for one, have started to wonder when communication became so cold meaningless. When did conversation with another human being lose its entire sentiment? When did we start speaking in 140 characters or less? You can’t possibly get to know the depths of another human like this, nor can you adequately express your feelings toward them. It’s often rude the way we try and abbreviate anything and everything So there were job applications , greeting cards on occasions , friendly letters to family , letters to pen pals and love letters . I have known of friends who wrote and received a letter every day for over a three year span to and from a to be spouse and they have been married for over 30 years ! Today a letter isn’t a fast enough way to communicate the changes in people lives. I guess that accounts for Instant nodles as well . In this age of the internet and social media everything is instant – even things like Yahoo, Hotmail and Gmail are ancient now . It’s the age of WhatsApp & Messenger . So you have to suffice with OMG, ROTFL, SCNR- and a hundred more . Some of these are so confusing that at my age I have to google to see what is being meant ! Just yesterday I was chatting with an old pupil of mine who is settled in Canada . By the time he had finished I had learnt a thing or two – YMMD ( You made my day ) , FACK ( Fully acknowledge ) , IMHO ( In my humble opinion) , & TIA ( Thanks in advance ) . He sure was polite but definitely short of time ! Old fashioned letters and cards are irreplaceable – they act as a reminder to the recipient – a reminder that they are truly loved; that they are valued; that their relationship with you is still very much alive. You simply can’t put a price on that.

Cards , greetings and the like

Was clearing out some old papers the other day and came across a bunch of cards- birthdays , Anniversary, Christmas, Easter , Get well Soon , Congratulations ……. They were from my mother who passed on 3 years ago . I went through the cards and began reminiscing – sure brought a tear to my eye and set me thinking . She loved sending cards and she made sure to write a few lines as well with news about herself and questions about us . Reading through those cards brought back wonderful memories . They gave me a warm fuzzy feeling – yes I felt good . In this fast paced world that we live in today , life is always in “Fast Forward” and we have no time nor inclination to stand and stare . It’s a waste of time to stop to smell the roses , to try the road not taken , to lie in bed and relax . I remember as a young boy using post cards , inlands, aerograms & stamped envelopes to write to relatives and friends . The joys of putting pen to paper is a long lost art and something that the present and future generation will consider a waste of time . Very few people including me , send card by the mail any more – not sure when was the last time I licked a stamp and stuck it on an envelope . Yes we licked the stamps ! Maybe yukky but it was done by almost everyone !. The whole process of writing with your hands, folding, inserting, addressing the envelope, sticking postage stamps and finally posting the letter in a post office is very time consuming for the present generation and people are running out of time or so they feel. However, with each day serving as a linguistic frenzy and a meaningless race against time , we find that words and sentences often aren’t used in the way we so desire. Small talk with awkward coworkers, someone bragging about their cute , new born , 7 pound baby on Facebook or telling the world where they went for dinner and what they ate , group projects with dead weight members – it is all very transient and often, discouraging and totally uninspiring . I, for one, have started to wonder when communication became so cold meaningless. When did conversation with another human being lose its entire sentiment? When did we start speaking in 140 characters or less? You can’t possibly get to know the depths of another human like this, nor can you adequately express your feelings toward them. It’s often rude the way we try and abbreviate anything and everything So there were job applications , greeting cards on occasions , friendly letters to family , letters to pen pals and love letters . I have known of friends who wrote and received a letter every day for over a three year span to and from a to be spouse and they have been married for over 30 years ! Today a letter isn’t a fast enough way to communicate the changes in people lives. I guess that accounts for Instant nodles as well . In this age of the internet and social media everything is instant – even things like Yahoo, Hotmail and Gmail are ancient now . It’s the age of WhatsApp & Messenger . So you have to suffice with OMG, ROTFL, SCNR- and a hundred more . Some of these are so confusing that at my age I have to google to see what is being meant ! Just yesterday I was chatting with an old pupil of mine who is settled in Canada . By the time he had finished I had learnt a thing or two – YMMD ( You made my day ) , FACK ( Fully acknowledge ) , IMHO ( In my humble opinion) , & TIA ( Thanks in advance ) . He sure was polite but definitely short of time ! Old fashioned letters and cards are irreplaceable – they act as a reminder to the recipient – a reminder that they are truly loved; that they are valued; that their relationship with you is still very much alive. You simply can’t put a price on that.

Saturday, 1 June 2019

Leadership

On Leadership It is imperative that you learn to listen before you speak . Understand what the other person is trying to say . At times and for whatever reason, they may not be exactly explicit . Learn to probe gently, without sounding inquisitive or threatening . It’s all about the tone and the body language being used by the parties involved . Learn to diagnose by listening with your ears- and eyes and heart . it’s surprising what you gather when you use all three. Find out what the most important behaviors are to the people you work with . Never assume that you know the person better than you actually do . Don’t assume that you have the answers or solutions to all the questions or problems . In no way do you lower your stature by saying – I don’t know ! It’s good at times to sit back and ponder over your interactions with your colleagues during the past week . Think of a time when you either, didn’t listen at all or didn’t listen well enough . What were the results ? What could you have done differently in terms of your reply or your behavior? This should help you the next time you are in a conversation . Stop and ask yourself – Have I really listened to this other person ? Do I really understand and appreciate how he or she feels right now ? Wise to set your own agenda aside and really focus on understanding the other person’s point of view before you share your own . Being reactive is often the cause of all misunderstandings and arguments . Understanding your superiors, peers and subordinates and really knowing what makes them tick is an integral part of the journey . Getting caught up in the illusion that you are the leader who knows it all and can fix it all is a fallacy.

Leadership

On Leadership It is imperative that you learn to listen before you speak . Understand what the other person is trying to say . At times and for whatever reason, they may not be exactly explicit . Learn to probe gently, without sounding inquisitive or threatening . It’s all about the tone and the body language being used by the parties involved . Learn to diagnose by listening with your ears- and eyes and heart . it’s surprising what you gather when you use all three. Find out what the most important behaviors are to the people you work with . Never assume that you know the person better than you actually do . Don’t assume that you have the answers or solutions to all the questions or problems . In no way do you lower your stature by saying – I don’t know ! It’s good at times to sit back and ponder over your interactions with your colleagues during the past week . Think of a time when you either, didn’t listen at all or didn’t listen well enough . What were the results ? What could you have done differently in terms of your reply or your behavior? This should help you the next time you are in a conversation . Stop and ask yourself – Have I really listened to this other person ? Do I really understand and appreciate how he or she feels right now ? Wise to set your own agenda aside and really focus on understanding the other person’s point of view before you share your own . Being reactive is often the cause of all misunderstandings and arguments . Understanding your superiors, peers and subordinates and really knowing what makes them tick is an integral part of the journey . Getting caught up in the illusion that you are the leader who knows it all and can fix it all is a fallacy.

Wednesday, 19 December 2018

New year's resolutions


 

 

Christmas will come and go in the blink of an eye. One minute you are putting up the tree, doing last minute shopping, getting a makeover in an attempt to look younger, decorating the house and planning your parties and the next you are putting away the dirty dishes, throwing away the accumulated garbage, labelling the packed decoration boxes and wondering why you feel bloated and exhausted.

Then there is the X’ Mas post mortem – how so and so’s cake tasted, the ill-fitting dress worn by a friend , the boring party , the small talk (read gossip), the boring sermon by an ill prepared priest , the overcrowded malls – the list goes on .

Santa goes back to wherever he is supposed to have come from, the reindeers are put out to pasture and sanity is restored once again.

Oh yes you also have gifts which you will probably recycle!

OMG where did the year go – the months really flew by !

And then everyone starts contemplating the New Year – fingers and toes crossed – hoping for good tidings.

Yippee it’s New Year’s resolution time. Research has shown that about half of all adults make New Year’s resolutions. However, fewer than 10% manage to keep them for more than a few months and that too is stretching it a bit!

 The origin of New Year’s resolutions is quite interesting. The ancient Babylonians made promises to their Gods at the start of each year that they would return borrowed objects and pay their debts on time. The Romans began each year by making promises to the God Janus, for whom the month of January is named. Thereafter bedlam has reigned with the whole world jumping on the bandwagon  and continuing,  what has now become a  craze

New Year’s resolutions are quite a pain but “What’s your New year’s resolution”? Is a question on so many minds in January every year so everyone starts thinking in advance so as not to feel out of sync during upcoming conversations?

 We all know how easily people can fall into bad habits and why on trying to give up those habits it is easy to relapse.

 New Year’s Resolutions usually come in the form of lifestyle changes and changing behaviour that has become routine and habitual can be hard to do.

Google the term ‘NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS’ and there are umpteen pages on the same.

The most common resolutions made every year around the world are: losing weight, doing more exercise, quitting smoking and saving money. All undoubtedly look good and meaningful.

 Who doesn’t want to fit into clothes better  , drop a size or two, be able to run a mile without panting , feel healthier and have some sort of a healthy bank balance .

The main reason that people don’t stick to their resolutions is that they set too many or they’re unrealistic to achieve. They may also be victims of the “false hope syndrome”. False hope syndrome characterized by a person’s unrealistic expectations about the likely speed, amount, ease and consequences of changing their behaviour.

So here is my new year’s resolution- to try and be a better person that I was in 2018 – for myself and those around me.

Not a SMART target but ok for someone who can do without the jargon.

So what’s yours?  

New year's resolutions


 

 

Christmas will come and go in the blink of an eye. One minute you are putting up the tree, doing last minute shopping, getting a makeover in an attempt to look younger, decorating the house and planning your parties and the next you are putting away the dirty dishes, throwing away the accumulated garbage, labelling the packed decoration boxes and wondering why you feel bloated and exhausted.

Then there is the X’ Mas post mortem – how so and so’s cake tasted, the ill-fitting dress worn by a friend , the boring party , the small talk (read gossip), the boring sermon by an ill prepared priest , the overcrowded malls – the list goes on .

Santa goes back to wherever he is supposed to have come from, the reindeers are put out to pasture and sanity is restored once again.

Oh yes you also have gifts which you will probably recycle!

OMG where did the year go – the months really flew by !

And then everyone starts contemplating the New Year – fingers and toes crossed – hoping for good tidings.

Yippee it’s New Year’s resolution time. Research has shown that about half of all adults make New Year’s resolutions. However, fewer than 10% manage to keep them for more than a few months and that too is stretching it a bit!

 The origin of New Year’s resolutions is quite interesting. The ancient Babylonians made promises to their Gods at the start of each year that they would return borrowed objects and pay their debts on time. The Romans began each year by making promises to the God Janus, for whom the month of January is named. Thereafter bedlam has reigned with the whole world jumping on the bandwagon  and continuing,  what has now become a  craze

New Year’s resolutions are quite a pain but “What’s your New year’s resolution”? Is a question on so many minds in January every year so everyone starts thinking in advance so as not to feel out of sync during upcoming conversations?

 We all know how easily people can fall into bad habits and why on trying to give up those habits it is easy to relapse.

 New Year’s Resolutions usually come in the form of lifestyle changes and changing behaviour that has become routine and habitual can be hard to do.

Google the term ‘NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS’ and there are umpteen pages on the same.

The most common resolutions made every year around the world are: losing weight, doing more exercise, quitting smoking and saving money. All undoubtedly look good and meaningful.

 Who doesn’t want to fit into clothes better  , drop a size or two, be able to run a mile without panting , feel healthier and have some sort of a healthy bank balance .

The main reason that people don’t stick to their resolutions is that they set too many or they’re unrealistic to achieve. They may also be victims of the “false hope syndrome”. False hope syndrome characterized by a person’s unrealistic expectations about the likely speed, amount, ease and consequences of changing their behaviour.

So here is my new year’s resolution- to try and be a better person that I was in 2018 – for myself and those around me.

Not a SMART target but ok for someone who can do without the jargon.

So what’s yours?  

Saturday, 15 December 2018

Christmas is round the corner


So it’s the 16th December 2018.

Nine days to go for Christmas and there is excitement in the air.

Thanks to Facebook , Messenger, WhatsApp and the like , many of us have been receiving our FIRST CHRISTMAS CARD , OUR FIRST CHRISTMAS TREE , OUR FIRST SANTA , OUR FIRST SNOWMAN over and over again from the 1stDecember onwards  . Not to mention being HIT by the FIRST VIRTUAL SNOW BALL .

 Nice – thank you - but a bit too much and over the top at times .

Cakes and cookies are being baked , Turkeys ordered and then there is that wild clamour to purchase gifts  in the malls . More often than not there are the usual end of year  sales where everyone ends up buying stuff they do not need in the first place .

Christmas Trees went up during the first week of December and those who could not find last year’s decorations, as they had been put away safely and now can’t be found , went out and bought new ones – only to find the old ones in perfectly good condition a few days later !

Then there are the curtains and the cushions- the new crockery and the crystal glasses kept for those special occasions .  

Not to forget  the urgent requirement for  new clothes and shoes which suddenly become a necessity despite the cupboard already being stocked with recent purchases   .

 If you are a lady , then this is a time consuming operation . Many shops are visited and bored, tired looking  salesmen can be seen putting back dozens of pairs of shoes , folding meters of  material and putting clothes back on hangers – obviously someone looked and walked on to the next shop where the same exercise was repeated .

 Most gentlemen are adept at quick shopping and are less fussy than their female counterparts  . They know what they want – go in and  get it and the job is over and done with before you can say Ho Ho Ho !

 Remember I said MOST . I know of many fusspots who spend ages and are somehow never satisfied with the goods on offer . These are the bespoke guys who take pride in giving measurements and going for umpteen trials- good for you .  

Schools are closed now and the children are suddenly in everyone’s way – wanting to eat meals at odd times  , itching to go out , asking for gifts ,  begging to be taken to the park .

All in all it’s a season of fun – friends to catch up with , time to travel if you so desire ,  great weather , plenty  to eat and not to forget – WEIGHT TO GAIN !

And by the way for those Christians like me – let’s not forget to keep the CHRIST in Christmas.

Be kind to one another !