Is free will actually free

 Does Free Will Truly Exist ?

It’s 4:45 am and the world lingers between night and dawn. Dubai is cold today - wintery crisp, carrying the faint promise of mornings that will soon turn warm. Outside, the darkness is beginning to soften, and a lone crow who we feed dares to break the silence ! 

I cradle a steaming cup of tea, its warmth seeping into my hands, my beautiful cat curled beside me in quiet companionship. I step out to bring in the morning newspaper.  The chill awakens me, and with it, my mind stirs. Suddenly dormant thoughts come rushing in, spilling over like ink on a blank page, demanding to be written.

I have thought of this before and have often wondered: Do we truly control our lives, or is everything laid out before us? Is there such a thing as fate, a path already carved, making our efforts irrelevant?

And then what about destiny?  It allows us to believe that whatever happens was meant to be. But if that’s true, then what is the point of effort, of struggle, of preparing ourselves for life? Can we challenge fate and shape a different future, or are we merely playing out a role we were always meant to fulfill? And who prepared this role for us in the first place?

I have seen people at close quarters blaming life for dealing them a bad hand. They fail, and instead of reflecting on their mistakes, they claim otherwise. I have also seen those who had wealth, thriving businesses, only to squander it through extravagance, lethargy, or poor decisions—yet they insist they weren’t ‘fated to succeed’.

I think back to times in my own life, when things didn’t go as planned, when there was no silver spoon or gilded platter - when circumstances felt unfair, but was it really fate? Or were there moments where I could have made a different choice, taken a different road? I still don’t know and probably never will. Was I dealt with a bad hand or was it the best hand ever?  I am more inclined to think it was the latter.

Like everyone else I have failed, and I have succeeded and had my fair share of both. I have had doors slammed in my face, only to have better ones open wide before me. Today I feel I am sufficiently successful in my profession. Was it fate that led me here, or was it the choices I made along the way? Thoughts like these often haunt me

Science suggests that many of our choices are influenced by forces beyond our control—our genetics and our upbringing?

At times, it does feel as if life has a momentum of its own, carrying us forward regardless of our intentions. Yet, in moments of decision, don’t we feel something deeper – a pull, or an urge to take control? I have felt it myself, the weight of a decision, the moment where one step forward could change everything. And I have seen others hesitate, trapped by the belief that their destiny is already written. I often counsel people to take that first step – however scarry it may seem at first – I did.

And then there’s luck. Why do some people always seem to win, even in games of chance, while others lose time and time again? Where does the phrase "gambling streak" fit in? I have known people who seem to have fortune smiling upon them, always at the right place at the right time, while others struggle endlessly despite their best efforts. If everything is predetermined, why does luck favor a few? Are they fated to be ‘lucky’?

Perhaps the truth lies somewhere in between.

Maybe fate sets the stage, but our choices determine how the story unfolds. Maybe luck exists, but what we do with it matters more. Or maybe, at this quiet hour, the answer is unknowable—and all that’s left is to keep moving forward, whether by fate or by will.

Grooming gone wild

 Grooming Gone Wild

For most of my life, my grooming routine has been refreshingly simple—get a haircut at an ordinary barber shop, a shave if I am feeling lazy, and maybe, if I’m feeling particularly indulgent, a head massage. That’s it- No fuss, no frills, just the bare essentials. But lately, I find myself being slowly dragged—kicking and screaming—into the ever-expanding world of men’s grooming. Now this is an industry worth investing in!

I see men around me with elaborate skincare routines to boot—cleansers, toners, moisturizers, serums, eye creams, exfoliators, and who knows what else. Some have dedicated morning and night routines, applying layer after careful layer like they’re restoring an ancient masterpiece. There are men getting manicures, pedicures, facials, and even eyebrow threading (when did that become a thing for men?). Some even discuss the benefits of Retinol and vitamin C serums – I am not even exactly sure what these do to the face. 

Mind you, they do look good, but I think I do too!

I, on the other hand, operate on a much simpler philosophy- if it’s a cream, it must be doing something worthwhile. I pick up whatever I find lying around on the dressing table —day cream, night cream, anti-aging cream (though I have no idea what it's supposed to prevent)—and slap it onto my face in a hurry. They all belong to my wife, but who cares. No circular motions, no expert application, and certainly no waiting for it to “absorb” into the skin for me. One time, I unknowingly used foot cream, and honestly, my face felt the same as it always does. There’s no science to my method, just a vague hope that a bit of moisture might be enough to keep my face from turning into an old leather wallet sometime soon.

While others dab, pat, and gently massage their faces with precision, I’m in and out of the bathroom in under a few minutes, wondering if I should be doing more or if I’m just the last man left who still believes a splash of cold water and ‘any cream’ in the morning, is a legitimate skincare routine.

While I barely give my face a second thought, the world of male grooming has exploded. There are charcoal masks, gold-infused serums, anti-aging potions, and a whole range of beard balms and hair-thickening solutions. Then there are the instruments—steamers to open pores, scrapers to clean skin, and rollers to stimulate collagen (whatever that means). Celebrities like David Beckham, Cristiano Ronaldo, and even The Rock have turned grooming into an art form. The result? Men now spend as much time (and money) on looking good as women.

Companies like L’Oréal Men, Nivea, and Gillette are making a fortune off this trend, selling everything from anti-fatigue moisturizers to an assortment of creams. And while I watch all of this unfold, I can’t help but wonder—am I the odd one out? Is this just the way of the future, or are men genuinely becoming more vain?

For now I remain an outsider with a simple routine if you can even call it that.

On being famous

 On being famous...

Once upon a time, being famous actually meant something. A person had to achieve something real—write a great book, discover a cure, climb a mountain, or lead a nation. Fame was a byproduct of excellence. Today? Fame is fickle, absurd, and often meaningless.

I think back to good old Allahabad, a city that once bred scholars, poets, and freedom fighters. Fame there was earned—by minds like Harivansh Rai Bachchan and Nehru, not by gimmicks. But even then, there were the other kinds—the self-proclaimed sadhus who "miraculously" produced gold coins from thin air, con men who promised hidden treasures to the gullible, and godmen who built empires off blind faith. Some of them have merely adapted to modern times, now selling spirituality online, building Instagram followings instead of ashrams.

And the madness isn’t just confined to religion. Look at today’s viral sensations—Dolly Chaiwala, whose hideous get-up and exaggerated antics have somehow made him famous, or Chandrika, the pav bhaji vendor who has turned street food into a circus act. Then there’s Lily Phillips, who pushes the limits of crassness just to stay relevant. What exactly are they famous for?

Compare this to true fame—the kind earned by legends like Sachin Tendulkar, who dedicated his life to mastering his craft, or M.S. Dhoni, who led with quiet determination and changed the face of Indian cricket. Amitabh Bachchan’s towering presence and relentless hard work made him the megastar he is, while Lata Mangeshkar’s divine voice, backed by years of discipline, cemented her place as the Nightingale of India. That was fame. Real fame. The kind that doesn’t fade with the next social media trend.

It makes me wonder: when did we start confusing attention with accomplishment? When did being loud, outrageous, or just plain ridiculous become enough to be celebrated? Back in the day, if you were famous, it was because you had actually done something remarkable. Now, it’s about being seen—no matter how absurd the reason.

And the worst part? Most of these so-called celebrities disappear as quickly as they arrive. The internet is full of fly-by-night influencers, scammers, and publicity seekers who rise like fireworks—only to burn out just as fast. 

Fame for the sake of fame is a hollow pursuit. At some point, the quest for recognition turns into a desperate act of absurdity. Maybe it’s time we stop chasing the spotlight and start focusing on what truly matters.

Work hard- save smart

 

Work hard- save smart

I’m not a financial expert, and I haven’t struck it rich—but over the years, life has taught me a few valuable lessons.

I often see young adults chasing instant wealth, hoping for overnight success, and believing they can bypass the hard work. Honestly, I smirk when I see it, but I don’t blame them. It’s easy to understand why.

Our parents believed in working hard, saving wisely, and thinking long-term. They understood the importance of showing up every day—without skipping work for frivolous reasons or making excuses to miss duty due to a minor ache. At times, you need to push through when things get tough at work and not give in to momentary discomfort. Today? That message feels outdated to many. The new generation wants instant gratification, expecting quick results without the patience for the long haul. Social media doesn’t help either. Everywhere you look, so-called financial experts claim they’ve found the secret to easy millions. Just click a few buttons, sit back, and watch your money grow. Tempting, right? But here’s the truth: most of those "experts" are better at selling dreams than building real wealth.

Yes, there are people today who make quick money—sometimes staggering amounts. But let’s be honest: those stories are the exception, not the rule. And what you don’t often hear about are the risks involved. Fast money is often fraught with danger. The same platforms that promise easy profits can wipe out entire fortunes overnight. I’ve seen people go from having more money than they ever imagined losing it all in the blink of an eye. Businesses collapse, fortunes vanish, and dreams shatter because people chased quick money without understanding the inherent risks.

Call me old-fashioned, but I believe in working hard and working smart. Anything worthwhile takes time—whether it’s building a career, running a business, or creating long-term wealth. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: simple, consistent investing from a young age works. Small, steady savings may seem boring, but they add up overtime.

I began working at a very young age, but it wasn’t until later in life that I realized the value of putting money aside. Being in the UAE for 24 years has helped me understand the power of financial discipline. It’s all about living simply—not trying to keep up with the Joneses and not splurging unnecessarily. The easy availability of credit cards and loans only makes things harder for those who lack self-control. It’s easy to fall into a cycle of spending beyond your means, but real financial security comes from knowing when to say no.

I won’t pretend to have all the answers, but I do know this: patience and discipline pay off. I’ve learned that true wealth isn’t just about how much you earn—it’s about how much you keep and how wisely you use it. I’ve done well for myself- being self-made is a satisfying thought, but I’ve also seen the rewards of living within my means and staying focused on long-term goals. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.

 

Beyond the first miracle

 BEYOND THE FIRST MIRACLE 

I’m sure you’d agree—

Being born is a miracle.

It’s the first one we experience,

And maybe the only one we take for granted.

From the start, life begins to unfold its journey

Parents and family guide us,

Offering love, patience, and a steady hand.

At the same time, the world isn’t always so kind—

It tests us, goads us, and forces us to grow.

School teaches more than facts and figures.

It’s where we learn patience—

In the quiet hours when no one’s watching.

Discipline—through repetition and practice.

And wisdom—from those

Who give their time and heart to shape us.

For me, shaping young lives through education

Became more than just a job.

It became a purpose—

A responsibility to guide, to care, and to lead.

Through every high and low,

Home has been my anchor—

The place I return to when things get tough

Life, in the end, is a canvas.

Every choice leaves a mark,

And every act of kindness adds color.

Let’s try and paint rainbows!

Being born—that’s the first miracle.

But what comes after?

That’s up to you .

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The 5 am club

 I know it's the weekend but waking at 5 is what my body clock has been doing for decades. Have begun to quite enjoy the ' me time'

I wake early  , make my tea and often just sit and think. Yeah , a boring old man I am ,but here's something to ruminate over- when is the last time you intentionally made time for yourself? I try and do it intentionally on as regular basis as possible - it's therapeutic. 

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s so  easy to get caught up in the daily grind, often prioritizing work, responsibilities, and obligations over what truly matters—creating meaningful memories.

 But are we making sufficient worthwhile memories with the people who matter most?

 With our families, loved ones, colleagues, and even our pets, these moments are invaluable. These memories are what we carry with us when life becomes challenging, offering us comfort, connection, and a sense of fulfillment. Yes I talk to the cat and I find it quite normal. I've seen so many people talk to their pets - that's love and fun simultaneously!

Too often, we find ourselves distracted by the pressures of modern life—emails to answer, deadlines to meet, and the constant buzz of social media. In doing so, we may overlook the simple joys of spending time with those who truly matter.

 Whether it's a spontaneous family outing, an afternoon chat or walk  with a pet, or an honest conversation with a colleague, these moments contribute to the tapestry of a life well lived life.

But beyond others, are we truly living for ourselves? Self-care, personal growth, and chasing our passions are essential in creating memories that are meaningful. Am following one of my passions more intentionally than before - am writing.

I always entreat people to read, write ,paint, travel, speak, dance, hike,learn to play an instrument- do anything that fuels you and makes you feel good.

 Taking the time to enjoy life's small pleasures, be it through hobbies, adventures, or simply moments of reflection, is critical to ensuring we’re not just existing but living fully- and you don't have to prove it to anyone.

You can be the worst dancer, have an awful singing voice and yet enjoy doing both!

In the end, it’s not about the quantity of our experiences but the quality of the memories we create.

 Let’s take a step back, refocus, and invest time in making memories that will nourish our hearts and souls for years to come.

A tame house pet?

 Random silly thoughts.

Have you ever wished you were a cat? 

A tame house pet.?

You laze around all day 

You are fed well 

Everyone gives you plenty of

love and attention

They want to cuddle you 

And play with you

And kiss you 

And you put up your price

And act snooty 

And they still say ' how cute"!

Then you slip out into the garden

And they go crazy

Searching for you 

And it makes you feel special

Coz you know you have them

Eating out of the palm of your hand

Or paw or whatever !

Then they  rattle your bowl

Promising you treats.

And call your name in desperation

While you peep at them

From under a bush or a chair

And you say to yourself

' it serves them right'

While sniggering !

Then when you are finally fed up

Of sitting alone and getting bored

As it's warm outside 

You get up and casuslly saunter in

Without so much as a ' by your leave'

And they are thankful 

And all smiles

And they thank God that 

You didn't decide to run away.

Makes you feel

Oh so special.

Their generous hearts are overwhelmed 

And they decide to get you 

Pampered and spruced up

So an appointment is booked

At a fancy pet spa

Costlier and sillier 

than the one for humans 

You come out feeling 

Bathed and bruised

brushed and dried 

Drained and stressed 

beyond measure

And smelling like an

Overpriced  powder puff

If only they knew

How much you detested this 

Utter nonsensical humbug 

You get home

And they are all cooing and smiling

And clicking pics

On their silly phones

While calling your name

Expecting you to pose.

Stupid humans for sure.

They ought to get 

Their act in order

 

All you want to do however 

Is rush to your litter box

And let it all out

It's been two hours of torture

Have they forgotten ?

But they are determined 

To shower you with more affection 

And the madness continues unabated

Till you hiss and 

Pretend to be annoyed

Tail waving and all

It's fun to see them scared! 

Finally they back off

While you make it to 

The litter box.

Then relieved

You tuck in 

And  go to sleep once again.

In a minute 

You're in dreamland 

It's a cat's life after all 

And humans should know

That cats rule.