My man cave

 

So, all my life I have been surrounded by women.

Now wait – that may give you the wrong impression- I am no Don Juan- please let me explain.

As a young boy it was my mother –who had many lady friends who often visited - then there was my aunt and her friends – then two female cousins who lived with us - and yes there were a few neighbourhood girls thrown in for good measure. There were boys in the colony too but that is a different story for another time.

Then I got married – one wife (obviously) and two daughters – good young women now and nothing wrong with that. The next thing I knew was, that a kitten had been brought into the household. I was not sure how to differentiate between a male and a female kitten, so I did the next best thing – I asked. You got it right – It is a female and I am crazy about her.

Lastly, I am in the teaching profession – have been so all my life. Now as you know, teachers and even Principals these days are mostly female. Hence even at work, its mostly women. Now don’t get me wrong once again – am not complaining as such, but it has just been and still is women, women, WOMEN!

However, to come to the point – I finally, I got up this morning and said it loud and clear to myself – I WANT A MAN CAVE and I WANT IT NOW!

We have a three bedroom flat and as there is one spare bedroom – this was a brilliant idea & why not? I need a sanctuary to think, to write, to read and in general to have some ME time! I have also read that it improves emotional health.

So here was the plan, made at around 5 am when I do all my planning!

I would first need to get rid of the junk in the room – the double bed, the bedside lamps, the dressing table, the boxes packed with stuff that was bought and never used, the packing cases with old clothes to be given away. The next was to decide what needed to go into “my man cave’’.

Now before executing any plan – however simple – it is always a wise proposition to pass it by the ladies in the house – all married men know this.

So, I did that as they woke – I think I got the timing slightly wrong.

So here is what my wife and younger daughter had to say.

Wife

1.       Why do you suddenly need a man cave?

2.        We cannot waste a room.

3.       Take the washing machine room (You can’t swing a cat in there)

4.       You are too old for a man cave.

5.       Stop it.

6.       OK go make one – better for us. It is good.  

Daughter

1.       Please have it – you have your own TV there and we can watch our programmes in peace.

2.       More peace for us too.

I was ecstatic!

So, this was the well thought out plan.

I will have my own room – MY MAN CAVE. I will have my TV, (have seen one that has caught my fancy), my Lazy boy recliner, my working table with my laptop, printer, scanner etc, my guitars and my bar and a small fridge.  I plan to add in some exercise equipment too. I suggested buying a dart board some weeks ago but that was shot down as being too dangerous (not sure for who). I will have a shelf with some books and a cupboard with my clothes and a couple of bean bags.

 As you see- all simple pleasures.

Someone once joked and suggested I purchase an expensive toolbox. However, I have said this before, and I am saying it again for the record  – I am NOT a handy man. So, putting nails into the wall, mending fuses, servicing the air conditioner or the gas cooker, screwing in nuts and bolts, repairing electronic equipment, repairing broken furniture etc is not up my street – in fact, it is nowhere on my horizon. I recently disconnected the TV for a stupid experiment and then tried to connect it back – I could not & we had nothing to see for two days till I got someone to fix it.

So, there will be no toolbox, no box with nuts, nails, screws, washers and bolts, no power drill, no working bench - nothing of that sort.   Everything was moving well- My list was ready – I had bathed & dressed, had a healthy breakfast, done the grocery shopping, brought all the items the family needed, and was ready to go & purchase my new television.

Then my elder daughter and her husband walked in. This was unexpected as it was rather early. The first thing my wife told them was about my plan for the man cave. Women can’t keep anything in, and they must blurt it out at the first instance. In my wife’s family they have perfected the art of sharing news with each other !

My daughter listened and there was no expression on her face. Then here is what my daughter said, and I will quote verbatim.

“That’s such a nice idea daddy, but once I have my baby we will be staying here over night quite often, at least during the first six months , so the room will not be empty .

I smiled as all good dads do and said, “are you having a girl”?

“Wait and see’’, was her answer.

Grandad to be will just have to wait.

My man cave will have to wait too.