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Sunday, 4 December 2022

Lady drivers are the best

 When I have nothing to do, I tend to do dangerous things- LIKE THIS.




Dear lady friends, colleagues, family and others. 


NO OFFENCE MEANT.


THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE.


PLEASE DON'T CUT ME OFF YOUR FB LIST.


PLEASE DONT BLOCK ME ON YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS.




I am just getting old and losing it so smile and give me some leeway.


AND BY THE WAY - SOME LADIES I KNOW ARE AMAZING DRIVERS !!!!


YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE-"RESPECT !


However.....


Most men complain


Not of the sun,wind or rain.


Not of unrequited love


Heartaches or pain


But of WOMEN DRIVERS.


And these are their laments.




To put it simply 


They say they just can't drive


Though they think they can.




They indicate left and turn right


Or else they don't indicate at all.


They make random stops 


And never can decide 


Which lane to take.




They ride the brakes


And speed through amber lights.


They care little for zebra crossings 


Because they see no zebras.




They use the high beam


 with wild abandon


And blind oncoming drivers.




You often see them sitting pretty


When the light turns green


With lipstick and eyeliner in hand


Deeply absorbed in looking good


And don't get me wrong 


They do!




They drive too slowly 


Usually in the fast lane


And dare others to overtake them


Or drive so fast 


The speed would put Michael Schumacher 


To shame.


 


As for parking ....


OMG


When that's happening 


Give them a wide berth


Lest a collision occurs


And you get the blame.




So if your wife's already driving 


Always keep money tucked away


For the dents, scratches and crashes




And if she intends learning 


Pray - don't stand in her way.


( Literally and Figuratively speaking )

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